Killin' Them Softly

“Some people try to bury you. Even the ones that’s closest”

I was a young nigga.

She was getting money from her ol’ man

just to buy me Timbs.

My granny said, stay out of that yard—

that’s not the yard you play in.

She was strict.

I was undisciplined.

Hearing shots bust,

hooping out windows, trying to catch the Papi bus.

I saw Poppy once. (Poppy my nigga)

And to those other niggas that told,

and hated,

that tried to ruin my reputation—

for my losses,

for all my time wasting,

I appreciate you.

You made me better

than I could ever be.

This ain’t no thank you.

This is an apology.

Because you saw something

you won’t ever be.

And how could you fathom

a nigga like me—

doing, becoming, growing,

and living better than you?

Huh?

Never, right?

Never in a million years.

Right?

I apologize.

Make Up to Break Up

“Sometimes intimacy isn’t reconciliation — it’s delay.”

— J. Elahi

We break up

to make up

after we just broke up.

I hold her.

All she does is cry and cum

becomes undone

while I stroke her.

It’s not the sex.

It’s the release of pain.

She says,

I love you so much.

Then I come back

and stay.

We’d sleep days away,

stay up late.

That’s when the problems disappear

and all the cheer in your heart fades.

Because I’m leaving today.

We just made back up

to start back at one.

It’s over.

Wild Youngins

“They weren’t born reckless—recklessness was what the world handed them.”

My wild youngins

kidnap niggas,

throw them in garbage cans

or bushes somewhere.

I’m scared of them too.

They come smiling like portraits,

styles like comic books—

laughing, haha and shit.

Fuck the night—

in the daytime

it get wild as shit.

You ever seen a nigga run someone down,

pistol pointed at a target,

missing every shot—

and the bullets stray

until somebody else gets hit?

I can’t explain it.

This reality—

not GTA shit.

“Fuck who’s the baddest.” — AZ

To them wild youngins—

thuggish, ruggish—

a time will come

when you remember

and realize how far you made it.

You were created by choice,

defined to exceed any dream you wish—

without getting trapped in it.

A drill makes holes.

Why be destructive

when you can be creative?

Don’t be desperate for friends.

It’s legendary—

most niggas who come up

get killed by who they’re with,

not who they’re against.

That shit is strange.

I had to learn one day.

Ain’t nothing safe

when the wild youngins

come out to play.

You Don’t Really Know

Sweating in my sleep,

fighting demons.

My past keeps catching up to me.

All I feel is scratches and heat—

they grabbing at my feet.

Then I wake up soaked,

to the point

I gotta take a shower

and change my clothes.

You don’t really know.